Life Goes On
by Bookwormy Angel
Summary: He looks exactly like his daddy. Oneshot. Implied MayaxLochan.


Sitting back against the bathroom wall, Maya pulled her legs up to her chest, linking her hands and placing her head between her knees. This couldn't be happening. No, no no no no. She stared forwards, her eyes unblinking. She could hear the noises of Kit trying to settle Tiffin and Willa for breakfast, the pans banging as he yelled agitatedly at them. He was stepping up now that Lochan was...gone.

This can't be happening.

She's probably over thinking it, really. It's probably only the flu, or something.

Grasping the wall, Maya hauls herself up and yanks open the door of the bathroom, running downstairs while yelling at Tiffin and Willa to eat so she can walk them to school.

The house feels different, more empty. Kit has stepped up, filling Lochan's shoes without question. Tiffin and Willa listen to them the first time around. Their mother has taken to stopping by every once an awhile, but she never stays long and Tiffin and Willa don't listen to her anymore. Kit listens to Maya and doesn't stay out past his curfew. Really, he doesn't even go out anymore.

Maya smiles at Kit as she flounces through the kitchen, pulling down bowls and setting them in front of the little ones. They greet her with happy shouts of "Maya!"

But it's different without Lochan.

Willa is more quiet, subdued. Tiffin comes in from soccer before the sunset and even helps Kit prepare dinner. Willa does her homework with Kit, who helps when she ask's questions. Maya does her chores, her homework like a robot. Nothing is the sam without Lochie.

Every once in a while, her eyes will drift to the drawer in the kitchen, where she put the knife. But then she'll hear Willa's laugh as Kit picks her up and flips her over, blowing raspberries on her belly. Or Tiffin as he comes careening into the house, yelling about a play he made during soccer. She'll hear Kit upstairs in his attic room, blasting his music while he does his homework. And she know she could never leave them. What kind of a sister would she be if she abandoned them? What kind of person would she be, letting Lochan risk his life for her, only to take a knife to her wrist?

So she moves on. Everyday, she gets out of her cold bed, pulls on clothes and lives life like nothing has changed.

Though everything had.

As the day's progressed, Maya woke up every morning with a sore stomach. She would rush to the bathroom only to empty up nothing. She couldn't cook meat anymore, because it made her gag and turned her stomach inside out. She couldn't take off her bra because her boobs hurt so much.

She knew this wasn't the flu.

Before she came home one day, she stopped at a little store and bought a home test. She couldn't meet the eyes of the cashier as he rung her purchase.

As soon as she got home, she rushed upstairs with hurried excuses as Kit leaned out of the kitchen with a worried look on his face.

Holding the little stick in her hand, she fell onto the wall and sunk down.

It was positive.

She was pregnant.

Ducking her head into her hands, she shook her head. No no no no no.

What was she supposed to do?

Already it was hard enough to take care of her siblings now, but if she added another mouth? Another body?

Her siblings.

What would they think?

Willa and Tiffin didn't know what happened. All they knew was that Lochan and Maya did something they weren't supposed and Lochan died. They didn't know about their relationship. But Kit did. Would he be angry with her? Would he understand?

Her eyes stung with tears, pricking at the back of her eyes as she stared at the wall in front of her. She refused to cry. This wasn't something she should be crying over.

Of course, there were options, like adoption. But she couldn't do that. This was her last link to Lochan.

Spinning his silver bracelet around her wrist she decided to tell Kit.

Pulling herself off the ground, she washed her face and carefully threw away the test, wrapping it and burying it at the bottom of the trash.

When she got downstairs, Kit looked at her knowingly, questions written across his face. She only shook her head slightly, gesturing at their little sister and brother. Kit nodded in understanding. She'd tell him later.

"What are you doin'?" Willa yelled, looking to Tiffin in surprise.

"Changing the channel! That cartoon was stupid!"

"Was not!" Willa defended, grabbing for the remote.

"Was too!" Tiffin shouted back, holding the remote above his head so Tiffin couldn't get it.

Maya smiled, walking into the living room and pulling her siblings apart, taking the remote from Tiffin. She sat on the couch, which then tuned into a dog pile as the two tackled her with crazy giggles, reaching for the remote. Kit watched from the kitchen, stirring the noodles in the pot as he watched.

He knew something was up with Maya. And it probably had something to do with Lochan. Every time he see Maya faking happy, it brings a pang through him because he knew he took what really made her happy. Guilt coursed through him as he thought about Lochan. Maya has told him over and over again that neither of them blames him and that they love him. Only it was coming from Maya. Lochan wasn't there to tell him those things and he regrets that. Kit wants to hear those things from Lochan.

He at least hopes his brother knew that he loved him. He wishes he had said that.

Pulling his eyes away from his siblings tussle, he continued stirring pasta.

Several minutes later, Maya appeared in the kitchen, pulling out plates, cups, and forks. In the living room, Tiffin and Willa had their eyes glued to the TV, the remote sitting where Maya was seconds before.

"Dinner!" Kit yelled, dumping portions of pasta onto the plates Maya had set out. Maya stepped out of the kitchen as Kit dumped a spoonful of meat sauce on top of the pasta. All of them, that is, except Maya's.

Dinner was wild and almost normal as Willa and Tiffin yelled across the table. Maya had to yell at them to stop when Tiffin threatened to throw his food at Willa.

After dinner, Maya took them to bed while Kit sat in the living room, prepared to bombard Maya with questions.

As soon as she stepped into the living room, her sweatpants and one of Lochan's old shirts eating her small frame, he jumped. "What's going on with you?"

She looked at him somberly, her hands wringing the hem of the shirt. Her red hair was mused and her pretty blue eyes were tired. "I'm pregnant." It came out rehearsed and high-pitched. Kit could only stare at her.

"Wh-what?"

She didn't repeat herself, but stared at him with tear glazed eyes.

He stood up, crossing over to her and pulling her slim figure to him. She was older than him, but already, he was gaining height on her.

"Everything will be okay," he mumbled, running his hand over her hair. Maya only sniffed. "How?" she mumbled, her voice thick.

Kit answered honestly. "I don't know."

* * *

As the months drug on, Maya's stomach expanded and grew. Tiffin and Willa didn't understand what was going on at first, but Kit sat them down and told them their sister was going to have a baby. Though he had to explain it in little kid terms, which confused himself and the kids until Maya butted in and explained. The only thing they didn't tell them was that it was Lochan's.

Their mom took it the hardest.

She showed up unannounced at their door. When she saw Maya, she demanded she get an abortion. Shocked and angry, Maya defended herself and her unborn baby.

"I love it because it's Lochan's! I'm not going to have an abortion because you don't understand!"

"That's the point, Maya! It's Lochan's! Things like this aren't supposed to happen!"

Kit had to haul Tiffin and Willa out of the house when they brought Lochan into the argument.

"Kit?" Tiffin asked, squeezing his hand and looking up at his brother as they walked outside.

"Yeah, lil' buddy?"

"What did Maya mean when she said the baby was Lochan's?"

Kit stopped walking, his stomach dropping to his feet. He didn't want to explain this to his little siblings. But he took the to the curb, sat them down, and explained what he could.

They were shocked, but they seemed to accept it.

"Does this mean we'll get Lochan back?" Willa asked, her eyes wide as she looked at Kit.

"In a way, I guess we will."

When they got home, long after the sun disappeared and the streetlights flicked on, their mothers car was gone. Inside, Maya was lying on the couch, scrunched up and tears racing down her face.

"Maya?!" KIt yelled tugging Tiffin and Willa inside before rushing to his sister's side. Placing his hands on her sides, he gently helped her move. "It hurts," she moaned, closing her eyes and clutching Kit's shirt.

"Tiffin, bring me the phone!" His little brother stood there, shocked. "Tiffin! The phone!" Kit yelled, sending his little brother running to the kitchen, Willa following close behind, her little face flushed.

"Maya, Maya, look at me," Kit said, holding her face in his hands. She opened her eyes slowly, pain etched in her blue irises. "Everything will be fine."

Tiffin handed the phone to Kit, who quickly called for an ambulance.

"How long has she been pregnant?" a man asked as he rushed her into the back of the ambulance.

"Uhhh...About...about seven months." Kit counted mentally.

The man nodded, jumping into the van then moving aside to make room for Kit, Tiffin and Willa. Willa sat on Kit's lap, her tiny little hand holding onto Maya's larger, frailer fingers. "Are we going to loose New Lochan?" she asked, looking to Kit. Maya was passed out, an oxygen mask strapped to her face as the EMT's took her vitals.

Kit steeled his features. "No. We won't."

* * *

Maya awoke to the dull beeping of a heart monitor. Opening her eyes, she was momentarily blinded by the bright white lights of a hospital room. Craning her neck slightly, she saw Kit, Tiffin and Willa asleep on a small uncomfortable looking couch. Willa was sucking on her thumb, curled into a ball on Kit's lap, while Tiffin was leaning against Kit's arm, his hair mused on one side. Running her hands over her stomach bulge, Maya felt a strap connected to a small box. As she was about to pull it off, a nurse hurried in.

"Oh! You don't want to mess with that, dearie! It's showing us the baby's heartbeat." She gestured to a machine below Maya's. "Is there anything I can get you, sweetheart?"

"No, thank you," Maya answered. "But, is my baby okay?"

"He's doing just peachy. Those were early contractions that were apparently brought on by stress. Nothing to worry about now." She smiled before patting Maya's hand and walking out of the room.

She watched her little siblings, silently apologizing for putting them in this situation.

She fell asleep watching them.

The hospital released her the next day with strict rules not to do anything stressful or over-work her body. When they got home, Tiffin and Willa let go of Maya's hands and ran to get toys. Maya hobbled to the couch, sitting beside Kit as he flipped channels mindlessly.

"I'm sorry," she whispered suddenly.

"What happened was not your fault, Maya," Kit said. "If anything, it was mom's." He didn't want to refer to her as mom, but he couldn't think of anything else. Sighing, Maya laid her head on Kit's shoulder running her hands over her large stomach and watching Tiffin and Willa.

* * *

Two months later, Maya was cooking dinner when her water broke.

She limped to the living room, grasping her belly, and called for Kit. He hurried downstairs, rushing to her with Willa and Tiffin in tow. Tiffin had a small bag in his hand, one that Maya had packed a few months ago. Willa was clutching onto Kit, slightly afraid. Kit called an ambulance, since a taxi would take too long to get there.

When they arrived at the hospital, Maya was already fully dilated.

She remembers the white hot lights beating down on her skin, the sweat pouring off of her in buckets, and Kit clutching her hand and motivating her. Willa and Tiffin were in the waiting room with their mother and her boyfriend, who both came reluctantly and with a threat hanging over their heads from Kit.

She remembers the sudden feeling of losing almost twenty pounds and the way her ears felt when they first heard the shrill cries of her and Lochan's baby.

"It's a boy!" the doctor called out as a nurse pulled out a blanket and let Maya hold him.

She held him gently, using a finger to stroke his dark black hair. When he opened his eyes, Maya saw green as bright as Lochan's eyes were, if not brighter.

"He's gorgeous," she whispered, tears springing into her eyes.

"He is," Kit agreed, watching.

The door to her room opened and their mother and little siblings bustled in. Their mom huffed to the chair in the corner, sitting and looking anywhere but at her kids.

"I wanna see!" Willa complained, tugging on Kit's arm. He hefted her up, and she stared down at Maya and the baby. "He looks wrinkly," she said, scrunching her nose. Everyone near her laughed.

"What're you gonna call him? Can we call him Lochan? He looks like Lochan," Tiffin said, staring at the baby. Maya and Kit looked at each other, both having tears in their lashes. "I think thats a great idea, Tiff," Maya said, looking back to her baby.

* * *

Lochan grew up to look like a clone of his father. He was tall for a little kid, with black hair and bright green eyes. And he absorbed everything like a sponge, just like Lochan.

"Lochan!" Maya called up the stairs one day, summoning her four year old to the living room.

"Comin' Mama!" he yelled back, his thudding footsteps cascading down the stairs. Kit, Willa and Tiffin were out, Kit having decided to take them to the park while Maya and Lochan did this.

"Ready to go?" she asked him, helping him slip into his winter coat. He nodded up at her, his green eyes bright. Maya picked him up, cradling him against his hip.

When they reached their destination, she let him down. He ran to the gravestone, a tiny smile on his face. "Hi Daddy!" He said, propping himself against the stone before proceeding to tell his name-sake about his week. Maya smiled, tears clouding her vision. "Hey, Lochie," she said to herself quietly as she watched her son talk animatedly.

She watched as Lochan told Lochie about what happened at school that week and how Tiffin won his soccer match and about how everyone worked together on a picture, but how he forgot it at home.

They stayed there for an hour, but when the sun disappeared behind the horizon, Maya said it was time to say goodbye.

"Bye, Daddy," Lochan said, petting the stone lightly. "I love you. See you again next week." Maya smiled, grasping her son's hand and leading the way home.


End file.
